[SPOILERS] Xenu Succeeds, BGN Fails! - RB's First Pitboss Succession Game

[spacetyrantxenu]

If you're playing in this game and you aren't BGN (and if you are BGN and it isn't your turn set) GET OUT!

If you are BGN and it is (or isn't) your turn set, just a reminder that you don't have access to rename this thread so the subject is sticking.  Enjoy your daily reminder of failure!  

[Boldly Going Nowhere]

"Set your goals so hopelessly low that you can't fail to achieve them." -Xenu

[Krill]

I thought you were having separate spoiler threads? This is a cop out.

[spacetyrantxenu]

This thread is to document my greatness and BGN's failures. If he wants to document his failures separately in another thread he can do that.

[spacetyrantxenu]

"Set your goals so hopelessly low that you can't fail to achieve them." -Xenu

Now you're getting it. To the banner with you!

[spacetyrantxenu]

I'd like to remind lurkers that there is a poll open and your votes are being monitored by at least one forum administrator! Be sure to vote correctly!!!

[Old Harry]

I voted on the premise that "better" means "more likely".

[Boldly Going Nowhere]

We had a bit of a team chat/pep rally last night.

Boldly: You're talking about what. You're talking about... Bitching about that game you shot, some sonofabitch who don't wanna give you land, some broad you're trying to screw, so forth. Let's talk about something important. They all here?
Wetbandit: All but one.
Boldly: I'm going anyway. Let's talk about something important. Put. That coffee. Down. Coffee's for closers only. You think I'm fucking with you? I am not fucking with you. I'm here from downtown. I'm here from Krill and Mardoc. And I'm here on a mission of mercy. Your name's Xenu? You call yourself a player, you son of a bitch?
Xenu: I don't gotta sit here and listen to this shit.
Boldly: You certainly don't, pal, 'cause the good news is - you're fired. The bad news is - you've got, all of you've got just one week to regain your jobs starting with tonight. Starting with tonight's sim. Oh? Have I got your attention now? Good. 'Cause we're adding a little something to this month's civ contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anyone wanna see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired. Get the picture? You laughing now? You got a map. Krill and Mardoc paid good money, get their names to have you play this map; you can't play the map you're given, you can't close shit. You ARE shit! Hit the bricks, pal, and beat it 'cause you are going OUT!
Brick: The start is weak.
Boldly: The start is weak? Fucking start is weak. You're weak! I've been in this business 15 years...
Xenu: What's your name?
Boldly: Fuck you! That's my name! You know why, mister? You drove a Hyundai to get here. I drove an eighty-thousand dollar BMW. THAT'S my name. And your name is you're wanting. You can't play in the man's game, you can't close them - go home and tell your wife your troubles. Because only one thing counts in this life: Get them to sign on the NAP which is dotted. You hear me, you fucking morons? A-B-C. A-Always, B-Be, C-Closing. Always be closing. ALWAYS BE CLOSING. A-I-D-A. Attention, Interest, Decision, Action. Attention - Do I have your attention? Interest - Are you interested? I know you are, 'cause it's fuck or walk. You close or you hit the bricks. Decision - Have you made your decision for Christ? And Action. A-I-D-A. Get out there - you got the neighbors coming in. You think they came in to get out of the rain? A guy don't walk on the lot unless he wants to buy. They're sitting out there waiting to give you their land. Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? What's the problem, pal? You - Xenu.
Xenu: You're such a hero, you're so rich, how come you're coming down here wasting your time with such a bunch of bums?
Boldly: You see this watch? You see this watch?
Xenu: Yeah.
Boldly: That watch costs more than your car. I made $970,000 last year. How much'd you make? You see, pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna play here - close! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get on a sim? You don't like it, leave. I can go out there tonight with the start you've got and make myself $15,000. Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can YOU? Go and do likewise. A-I-D-A. Get mad you son of a bitches, get mad. You want to know what it takes to play civ? It takes BRASS BALLS to play civ. Go and do likewise, gents. Land's out there. You pick it up, it's yours. You don't, I got no sympathy for you. You wanna go out on those sims tonight and close, CLOSE. It's yours. If not, you're gonna be shining my shoes. And you know what you'll be saying - a bunch of losers sittin' around in a bar. 'Oh yeah. I used to be a civ player. It's a tough racket.' This is the new map. This is a KrillMardoc map. And to you it's gold, and you don't get it. Why? Because to give it to you is just throwing it away. It's for closers. I'd wish you good luck but you wouldn't know what to do with it if you got it. And to answer your question, pal, why am I here? I came here because Krill and Mardoc asked me to. They asked me for a favor. I said the real favor, follow my advice and fire your fucking ass, because a loser is a loser.

[spacetyrantxenu]

That's a quality shit post right there.

I just have to ask about your recent performance, Mr. Brass Balls. How did PB38 turn out for you? Oh that's right, you couldn't hack it, you quit to go spend time with your wife and kids. Me? I was CLOSING. I was already driving the BMW. I just got boomed by mackoti driving a Tesla. But that happens to everybody. PUT THAT COFFEE DOWN! Coffee is for closers only!

[Kanye MAGA]

bby what is you doing?